for sure

posted on: April 13, 2011

I do the same thing every Sunday, a ritual I guess. After church, I change out of skirts and curls into my most unflattering comfy clothes. I drive home to my parent's house for a real dinner and free leftovers. I go there to chat on the napping couches with mom and dad about neighbors and tithing and Texas. I go there because my sister sings loudly in the study and my brother is silently funny. We pray on our knees.

I also go there to read the new magazines. I flip past the news in the Sunday paper and pluck out Parade to read about celebrities and polls. I gather my mom’s stack of two or three magazines by the phone, usually Real Simple, House Beautiful, and O--Oprah's magazine. I turn the pages at the counter while my mother stirs the roast gravy and steams the asparagus. I flip them cover to cover.
Oprah writes a regular little bit on her last page called, "What I know for sure." She writes about politics and about her own credos and about a unifying power that some people call God, and sometimes she invites a famous friend to share their own for-sures. She's been writing these bits for 11 years--that's one-hundred-and-thirty-two bits. One-hundred-and-thirty-two bits are lot of bits to know.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I don't care much for what Oprah knows. What I'm saying is that I don't think Oprah knows that much because I know for sure that gold rings with jadey beads are the prettiest. I know how to park in tight parking garages. I know that stripes are better than dots, and pink is better than brown. I know that bookshelves are for books and not for obscure trinkets. 
 I know for sure about Harry Potter. I know that Hermione’s parents are muggles and Dobby is a house elf. I know that butterbeer is not really beer. I know that every boy and girl wants Hogwarts to be real, and I know because my best friend rapped about red Ron in an wishful audition tape for the films. I know for sure that Dumbledore had to die and Harry had to live. I know that J.K. Rowling is more than a millionaire—she is an author.
I know for sure about Café Rio. I know that they have crushy, good ice. I know for sure how to say, black beans, no cheese, and extra cilantro. I know that pork is the best, followed by steak and grilled chicken. I know for sure to avoid it on Friday and Saturday nights, but I know that I love to ignore that rule at least twice a month. I know that the tables are small and the dressing is spicy. I know about Free Meals and flying limes.
I know for sure about basketball because the men in my family are rockstars. I know for sure not to walk down the bleacher stairs when the time starts and I know that sometimes fouls aren't bad. I know that, if asked in the middle of a play, Dad will quickly hand over a couple of bucks for a vending machine drink. I know that 6'11 is probably a good idea.
I know for sure about travel. I know to bring extra cardigans on the plane and I know that I don't need lots of gum to pop my ears on the decent. I know for sure that mini-vans are inferior to SUVs and that tourists should always eat local. I know about Fast Passes and how Disneyland lines are for the weak. I know that Coronado is perfect and Café Constant will always be the benchmark. I know for sure about coming home.
I know for sure about that unifying power Oprah talks about. It's called God. He is God. I know that God is real and that he is everywhere, even in me. I know he rigs contests and makes 69-minute hours. He works with text messages and bright yellow flowers at Costco. 
I know for sure that love is pretty much everything.
I know that it's okay to not know what I'm talking about most of the time.
I know for sure that magazines on Sunday is the best kind of ritual.
And napping couches the best kind of home.

18 thought{s}:

  1. I want Cafe Rio so bad now! And Hogwarts. Oh boy do I have a story for you ;)
    You are lovely

  2. that is a great post .. love it!

  3. I'm glad you shared your testimony about Harry Potter. I know those things too.

    Also, I saw that ring and knew (hoped) that you would buy it.

    Lovely post, Britt.

  4. explain this: bright yellow flowers at costco. I feel there is a story there I would like to hear.

  5. found your blog through Mandy's and I'm so glad I did. I have the same feelings about Oprah and her universal opinions, I loved this post. Especially your assertion about God. Wonderful.

  6. Posts like this are the reason that I love your blog with my whole blog-lovin' heart.

  7. Sunday afternoons are the best part of the week. Hands down.

  8. this was beautiful!
    good luck on finals, girl. you are a freaking rockstar.

  9. i know for that i'm really glad i took the extra time to read every word of this post.
    i know for sure about a cafe rio pork salad, no beans, just rice, shredded lettuce, house dressing no cilantro.
    i know for sure i like you more because of this post *wink*

  10. obsessed with this post. your writing never ceases to amaze me.

  11. I love that you know for sure about Cafe Rio, because I do too... maybe this is a sign? Lunch date there soon? Love you. and your writing. You are seriously fabulous.

  12. you are a wonderful writer. this made my day. thank you for sharing what you know :)

  13. i'd rather read what you know than what oprah knows any day of the week.
    viva le hp!

  14. Brittany! I'm doing so good! How about you?
    By the way, this is probably my favorite post ever.
    Especially the parts about HP and Cafe Rio:]

  15. Britt. Your posts just fill me with optimism. And your writing is beautiful.

  16. You are fantastic. Really. I love the part about God, so so much.

  17. It really is a shame that killer audition tape didn't lead to anything great, well anything besides jokes and laughs. I know for sure that I love Brittany Austin


She's a piratey soul, full a' vinegar and glitter.

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